Let’s pause in honour of Boris Johnson’s extraordinary achievements in winning. He’s winning the race to be the least successful Prime Minister in history — winning the battle to lose more Commons votes than any of his predecessors, winning the battle to reduce his party to previously unknown numbers in Parliament, and winning the battle to be hauled in front of as many different courts as possible.
Another torrid week for the Prime Minister ends with him having to deny lying to the Queen, his secret no-deal risk assessments made public, his hopes of a snap election in tatters.
But it’s not going well for Labour either — the party now appears to have three directly contradictory Brexit policies, which is definitely two more than any party needs.
Plus we say bye bye to short-tempered John Bercow, as the Speaker confirms he’ll step down.
And Theresa May hands out rewards for failure among her advisers, which is bound to take ages.